Sunday, February 13, 2005

I Need Love

Valentine's Day.


What do I think about Valentine's Day? I dunno. Seriously, I really don't.

I used to fancy myself a romantic but I'm not so sure anymore. And is Valentine's Day REALLY romantic anyway? Isn't it just a chance for people who aren't genuinely romantic to force themselves into it once a year?

What is romantic these days?

I love chocolate and flowers and diamonds. But I love those everyday and while on Valentine's Day I'm not going to turn any one of them down, I still think they'd mean more if they came on a totally random unexpected day.

I love long walks on the beach at sunset.

I'm a sucker for a public marriage proposal. Take me to a wedding? Forget about it, I'm a mess. I bring a whole package of tissues and I use them all. But I'm constantly telling people that I don't want that kind of wedding for myself. It's too public. Maybe I'm only privately romantic?

Write me a love poem? I'll laugh at you. Sorry if you're sensitive, but poetry? Not my thing.

Love songs? LOVE love songs. The title song of this blog, "I Need Love", by LL Cool J? My heart pounds when it comes up on the iPod. And most people laugh at the cheesiness of it. For me when it comes to love songs, the cheesier the better. I even love the final ballad on JT's solo album so much that I'll listen to it two or three times in a row. [Did I just really reveal that?]

Love stories? Awesome. I used to judge a movie's worth by how much it made me cry. Pretty Woman, My Best Friend's Wedding... all the Julia's. All of them. My favourite romantic movie? Terms of Endearment. TERMS OF ENDEARMENT people. Saddest, sappiest love story of all time.

I love puppies and teddy bears and babies... oh my!

But despite all the evidence I've listed here to the contrary, I just don't think I'm very romantic. Or maybe I'm just not good at forcing romance.

For me the most romantic moments happen when I'm least expecting it. It's found in a photo that someone took of me when I wasn't looking. A photo that shows how beautiful they think I am (even if I think I look chubby).

It's found in the quick kiss I get when I'm in the middle of a totally mundane sentence. "So, then we have to take the dog for a poo, then I'll put [INSERT KISS HERE] clean sheets on the bed, then we can watch the news and go to bed."

Now that's romantic.

Valentine's Day. You know what? Whether you love it, or whether you hate it. I hope you find a few stolen and unexpected moments of your favourite kind of romance tomorrow. A wink, a proposal, a loving slap on the bum. A quiet cuddle with your baby or your puppy. A romp in some new lacy lingerie.

I may not need conventional or contrived romance to be happy. But you know what I do need? I need love.