Weight Gain: OMG, OMG, OMG. I can't. I just can't. Let's suffice it to say, this is going to leave a mark.
Milestones this week: Lovely lady lump no longer quite so lovely. No longer recognizable to self, family or friends. Husband no longer wants to make eye contact, let alone physical contact. Pictures, other than these faceless, thighless, belly pics (must finish what I've started for documentary sake), are officially banned. Cravings consist of nothing but beer, wine, hard liquor and cigarettes. And, for some reason, orange juice. Gallons of it. I get up and chug it from the carton at 5 a.m. Exercise - what's that? Even my teeth are fat.
As for Chicken, she's pretty awesome. Not much room in there for her to bust her Kung Fu madness anymore, so instead she's taken up Thai Chi. Lots of stretching and holding and looong slooooow movements. One of her favourite activities is elbowing (or kneeing, I'm not sure which these days) The Momes in the face. He has become a bit obsessed with my belly and pretty much exclusively spends the night curled up as if sitting in my lap, with his head on my bump like a pillow. Chicken takes issue with his snoring (you'll get used to it baby girl, trust) and wakes up to poke him in the face several times a night. Doesn't deter him for more than a minute or two before he's back for more.
Speaking of my belly... brace yourselves:
1 comment:
I just hope you don't give in to those beer, wine, hard liquor, and cigarette cravings. You know that can cause severe mental and physical defects in your baby.
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