You've Gotta Know When to Hold'em

Oh Kenny Rogers, you are so wise.

You really DO need to know when to walk away, people. And truth be told, I know. I do know. I just don't LISTEN TO MYSELF. Myself says, "Beaches, get up now and walk away." And then what do I do? NOTHING. I just sit there and I lose all my money. Because it's not really money at that point, is it? It's just chips, or credits, or funny numbers on a digital screen.

Regardless of my complete and utter lack of luck this time around, I had an absolutely magnificent trip to Las Vegas. Crown, Commie and Moms had a blast, too. I'm glad that the guys enjoyed it, because maybe that means that they'll come back with us again sometime. It was nice to have them there.

Not that I don't love the all-girl trip! Man, do I love that. And ladies, if you're reading, we're going to set another one of those up really soon, okay? We'll take Sin City by storm.

Anyway this time around, me and the fam had the "true" Vegas experiences. We saw the Hoover Dam. Damn.

We saw the new Cirque Du Soleil show at the MGM Grand. Incredible. You must see it before you die, seriously.

We saw all of the hotels, we visited the historic Fremont Street, we ate at a ridiculous buffet, we lounged in the sun and of course, we let the house win.

It was the perfect way to celebrate my birthday. Now if only I'd listened to my inner Kenny...

Holy crap ya'll. I'm thirty.

I Like to Move It, Move It

Another lie. I hate to move it, move it!

However, we did it. On Saturday. And I can honestly tell you that it wasn't at all the nightmarish experience I anticipated it to be.

Because I'm the most neurotic, anal retentive, o.c.d. freak alive, we were insanely organized in time for the big day.

Saturday morning arrived. The truck was out front. At 10 am just like we asked, our gaggle of super-heros showed up raring to go. All the players were there: The Wizard, Dynamus, DRock, Double D... we had that truck loaded in about an hour. Then we unloaded it because it was the worst truck-loading you could imagine (a small wrinkle in the plan - but I digress), we had it reloaded and ready to go all before noon. Then it was perfect.

Team Move set out for the new pad, where we were met by The Queen of Tarts (aptly named because she brought us a box of these delectable treats from the store with the same name), who was a tremendous help on the unloading side.

All in all, the entire move was done about about 3 pm. I can not thank our wonderful friends and family enough for their help, kindness and enthusiasm during what could have been a tremendously stressful and difficult week. They not only made it easy, they made it fun. They made it a time that Crown and I will remember fondly. They made us realize that we have the best friends anyone could ask for.

Here's a shout out to all who helped, because we love you and you deserve it:

G.Party: because he can carry records almost as well as he can play them.
Double D: because he could back a cube van through a straw without a scratch
DRock: because he understands that Tim Horton's heals all wounds
Dynamus: because, well, because he's always fun to have around no matter what the task at hand
The Wizard: because he didn't laugh at me too much when I vacuumed under each item as he lifted it up
The Queen of Tarts: because she's lovely and she brought two things that I love more than she probably even knows: baked goods and flowers
Weirdo: because he can fit boxes into his Hyundai Accent like clowns into a VW Bug
Moms and Commie: because of so many reasons, but caring for The Momes, a much too generous housewarming gift and genuine excitment for us would top the list
Crown Sr. and AJE:: because of Veuve Cliquot, brie and strawberries
The Vach's: because of their willingness to help out however and whenever we need them, and because they have been excited and eager for our move since the moment we bought that little red dot

I know that I'm a softie, but just thinking of all of you and how fabulous you are, makes me teary. Even if you don't realize it, you made one of the biggest and most exciting times of our lives that much more special just by being you.

Dudes, you rock.

Summertime and the livin' is easy.

Um. No it isn't.

This has been a crazy summer filled with "stuff to do" and "places to go" and "houses to move into."

Not just for me, either, but for everyone that I know. What this means for Beaches' Speeches is thrice-fold:

1. It's not getting written. I'm too busy and the weather is too awesome to spend time inside being thoughtful and, well, literate.

2. It's not being read anyway. Practically everyone that I know is either getting married, moving, traveling, having babies or bringing home new puppies. These busy friends are all I've got by way of readers. Hey you three, sorry for not writing.

3. Finally, it means that there is a lot of material being collected and a lot of stuff to fill you in on. Good things come to those who wait. There, how literary was that?

Okay. So give me just a little while longer. I have to pack, go to the cottage, pack some more, move, settle in... then I'll write. It seems like a lot, but it's all happening like right now, so really it's not that far away.

I just know your breath is baited. Peace out.

Behind the Wheel

Oh ya. I forgot to write about one major event that recently went down. Crown and I bought a car.

As my dear friend Mr. Rush so eloquently put it, "Congratulations guys, you just increased your ecological footprint."

Great. And yes, I do feel guilty about that. However, I'm going to turn THIRTY like any minute now and I've never owned my own car. So, I feel like that might let me off the hook a tiny bit. I mean, I could have been pumping harmful emissions into the universe for years now, but I haven't. At least they make'em a little cleaner these days?

Also, I don't drive to work. I take the smelly, germ infested TTC like the rest of the suckers. And that might not be good from my mental or physical health, but damn it, it's good for the air.

Anyway. Our first car is a Mazda 3 sedan and it's purple. They try to hide the fact that it's purple by calling it Indigo Blue but they aren't kidding anyone. It's freakin' purple. And I LOVE it. The freedom! The freedom! Even though we really hardly use it at all (there's this terrible fear of losing our parking spot) it's always there in the back of our minds. We can DRIVE there.

Want to go to the zoo? We can drive there.
Want to go grocery shopping? We can drive there.
Hey, maybe we should go to the cottage this weekend? YES! We can drive there.

It's truly amazing. And I promise, When hybrid cars that run on carrots or whatever are available and reasonably affordable, I'll be first in line. But for now, it's high gas prices and the open road for this chick.

So buckle up, baby, because I'm behind the wheel.

It's Getting Hot in Herr

Welcome to Nellyville ya'll. For about the seventh day in a row we're experiencing 30 + degree weather in the TDot.
And you know what? I fucking LOVE it!

It's sweaty. It's muggy. It's summer!

I just wrapped up my Saturday morning vacuuming and there's little beads of sweat dripping down my calves. That never happens to me. In fact, I can work out for an hour at full tilt and not get the leg sweat. But today, a couple squats to reach under the bed and a couple calf lifts to get the top shelves and I'm Sweaty Betty. It's great. I feel like I've been pumping iron.

The Momes is in repertory arrest, of course, but I can tell he loves it too. Like mother, like pugger.

Sorry to everyone who hates this kind of weather, but perhaps you can find it in you to be happy that at least one person in this city is sitting around, sweating from the legs, and smiling.

It's getting hot in herr, so take off all your clothes.